yyt

i have been a bit frustrated with my plans for the time when i wasn’t seeing grad students on friday, i was to pick an area of chicago and wander - something that i did with ease when i wasn’t doing it as a project - but haven’t been able to bunch the therapy sessions so that i have chunk of time where i can explore.

i do like carrying the leiquinhas as the cameras du jour when i do go a wandering. in fact i have been making it a point of having it on me when i pass through the homeland security wgas style and enter the wide world - even if i am only in transit between the ivory towered buildings. not only are they carried but visible and at the ready - which draws a lot of stares for while photography is talked about a great deal actual picture making is rare.

as a result when i conjecture about a potential picture i actually see if i am correct or not. i not only wonder but also experiment. this brings back the time when i had to walk between wgas and uic at lunch where i would try to take a different path. i am starting to notice light, patterning, surreal juxtapositions and as i don’t take it seriously, i don’t hesitate to let the film fly. i have even stopped on the way to wgas immigration/passport control put down the courier bag, dug out the leiquinha and made snaps.

the hardest part of this has been when i do head out on “official” rambling where i would normally carry joãozão for the detail and to feel like a real photographer. this is the reason why i only bring the leiquinhas as it is either one of them or nothing. while i haven’t been able to make it to say albany park or beverly,there have been walks to the west loop for lunch and trying to find some galleries, has produced not only snaps but again snaps of people - movers who have dared me to make a snap, the person who made my sandwich at graziano where i have photographed everyone there and been given samples of cheese. returning for another sandwich means i leave another snap. even in the loop i am prone to taking long ways to destinations, linger at corners, and walk on the side of the street where the sun penetrates windows.

it is still difficult for me to look at the results of 35mm film - so many images and they are so small on proof sheets. i, now, don’t worry about the image quality falling apart as i have lost interest in making large snaps and find engagement with my surroundings much more interesting.